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April 19 Sick of guys!
March 24 What a girl wantsDICTIONARY FOR WOMEN''S PERSONAL ADS: 40-ish.........................49 Adventurous................Slept with everyone Athletic........................No Boobs! Average looking............Ugly Beautiful......................Pathological liar Contagious Smile..........Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure........On medication Feminist.......................Fat Free Spirit.....................Junkie Friendship First..............Former slut Fun...............................Annoying New-Age........................Body hair in the wrong places Old-fashioned.................No BJs Open-minded..................Desperate Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing Passionate.....................Sloppy drunk Professional...................Bitch Voluptuous.....................Very Fat Large frame...................Hugely Fat Wants Soul Mate.............Stalker WOMEN''S ENGLISH: 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you’ll be sorry 6. We need to talk = You’re in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = You better not 8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? MEN''S ENGLISH: 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = Let’s have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you 11. I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit = I’m gay ROMANCE MATH Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. HAPPINESS To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die. PROPENSITY TO CHANGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does. DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. March 17 so in love with my bonitoWhat i love to do the most is being with my darling, I am more than in love with my husband, my lover, my best friend, all of them the same man! living the dream with Pat is the most amazin thing ever happened to me, couldnt asked for more! love you gordo December 17 El mejor consejo. por LonnyDecember 16 MEN HAHAHA1. Men are like...Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you. 2. Men are like...Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are. 3. Men are like...Weather. Nothing can be done to change them. 4. Men are like...Blenders. You need One, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are like...Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like...Commercials. You can't believe a word they say. 7. Men are like...Department Stores. Their clothes are always 1/2 off. 8. Men are like...Government Bonds. They take sooo long to mature. 9. Men are like...Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. 10. Men are like...Popcorn. They satisfy you, but only for a little while. 11. Men are like...Snowstorms. You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. 12. Men are like...Lava Lamps. Fun to look at, but not very bright. 13. Men are like...Parking Spots. All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped. March 23 TOÑOLos que viven en nuestros corazones siempre estarán con nosotros No podemos controlar el paso del tiempo, ni tampoco controlar nuestros propios destinos ni los destinos de los que amamos. Pero podemos encontrar consuelo al saber que los que han vivido en nuestros corazones en realidad nunca se van. Porque mientras los conservemos dentro, en nuestros corazones y pensamientos, siempre estarán con nosotros. Porque el amor, que es eterno, nunca cesa de existir. Con Amor... Marita March 21 Happy Birth OmarTe quiero decir muchas cosas por medio de esta carta y sinceramente te la mereces...
TU AMISTAD VALE MUCHO. Te Quiero decir que si mañana dejo de existir, te observaré en el cielo, te cuidaré y, sobre todo, trataré de que no sufras. Te quiero decir... que, si dejas este mundo, Dios no lo quiera, te recordaré,siempre te querré y cada noche hablaré contigo. Quiero que sepas que te quiero mucho y eso es algo muy importante para mí, ya que hay veces que uno cree que no es conveniente decirlo por cualquier razón. Se que debí decirte antes cuanto te aprecio, pero si por alguna razón no nos volvemos a ver, te dejo esta nota para que sepas lo mucho que te quiero. Y si no alcanzaste a decírmelo tú y yo dejo de existir, no te preocupes que por el simple hecho de que nació nuestra amistad, sabré que me aprecias. Recuerda que nunca sabemos cuando dejaremos de existir, por eso quiero decirte hoy con esto: !QUE TE AMO MUCHO! |
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